Funniest Joke I Ever Heard: Another Epic Mistake on the Part of ESPN and Sheridan Hoops

I’m back!  Sorry, it’s been so long; I’ve been having some serious motivation issues because of my somewhat depressingly low readership count.  As you may know, I like reading Patrick Minton at, which is a part of the Wages of Wins Network.  Well, Patrick wrote a post about Pau Gasol today, decrying the media backlash behind Pau Gasol’s benching in favor of Earl Clark.  Clark’s on the hot streak of his career, he’s playing great, and Pau’s not; thus, I agree with Patrick.  No big deal, I do this all the time.

Patrick also likes to make fun of the people at for their conventional views.  A certain James Park wrote an article entitled “Tweet of the Night: Jalen Rose” where he..referenced tweets from Jalen Rose and, as a bonus, Rose’s buddy Bill Simmons.  They are:

From Jalen: So let me get this right. Gasol won 2 chips playing alongside Bynum yet can’t play w/D12 who is faster than both of them?! #Confused#NBA.

And from Bill: If I were a Laker fan I’d be so pissed off right now. They won’t even get 50 cents on the dollar for Pau at this point. Well done Mike D.

Aside from Patrick’s point about the massive increase in Earl Clark’s trade value-an increase substantially larger than any hit the Spaniard’s market value took-I have anything to add.

I honestly don’t understand why Jalen Rose is a trusted analyst considering that THE MAN GREATLY BENEFITED FROM PLAYING BAD BASKETBALL, NAMELY THE ART OF VOLUME SCORING!!!

Of late, my favorite statistics have been a) Wins Produced, b) EzPM, if I manually eliminate the Usage adjustment, c) Estimated Impact, and d) Win Shares.  EzPM and Estimated Impact are not publically available for any portion of Jalen Rose’s career as far as I can tell, but Wins Produced is available since 2000 and Win Shares is available for basically the entire history of the NBA.

Well, has player salaries listed on its website for each season of their career.  Over the course of his NBA life, Jalen Rose made $102,438,250, an average of roughly $7,850,000 a year for thirteen seasons.  That is a boatload of money, even when you consider that a lot of that is lost as taxes.  According to Win Shares, if you value a win at $1.7 million as Arturo Galletti graciously calculated as the average value a couple years ago, do you know how much of that Jalen Rose actually earned?

He earned exactly $80,240,000 of it, also known as only 78.33% of what he actually made.

Remember that Win Shares is a bit of a High Usage apologist-look at Allen Iverson’s statistics for proof.  Over the course of Jalen Rose’s career, he averaged 1.21 Points Per Shot, which is my favorite “mini-metric” for evaluating scoring prowess, which is not a considerable amount above average.  According to Wins Produced, Jalen Rose produced a measly 14 wins or so in the final seven seasons of his career (which is all that can be found at The NBA Geek), which equals $23,800,000 in worth.  Over that span, the man made more than that in any combination of three seasons, or any two of his final four.  His valuation looks even worse when you consider something pretty major.


Yeah, Jalen Rose is a bit of a microcosm of basketball’s major problem of his generation, a greater focus on points per game than points per shot.  Even PER thought he was an average player; if you put it on an exponential scale look I have done with PERrate, Jalen’s best season would have produced only .141 PERwins per 48 minutes, and his career average would have been .104 on that scale.  Furthermore, a truly mathematical glance would scale this done further, as the nature of exponentiality dictates that the distances between values increase the farther to the right of the scale you go, meaning that players at the high end have more positive value than those on the low end have detrimental value.  In other words, this examination is skewed in favor of above-average players by nature, so Jalen’s numbers would be even less!

ESPN claims to give a darn about statistics, but it only cares about the “E” that stands for entertainment.  I still don’t understand how Jalen Rose is such a vaunted analyst there, but I can be a stubborn mule myself.  Thank you for readng, please comment, and please come back.


2 thoughts on “Funniest Joke I Ever Heard: Another Epic Mistake on the Part of ESPN and Sheridan Hoops

  1. Bobby –
    I enjoy your “matter of fact” style – straightforward, and you write what you think, and that is very good.
    Yeah – J Rose got overpayed in his career as a player, but his Win Shares and his points per shot have little to do with his contribution, insight, and effectiveness as an analyst. I am not saying that he is any good at NBA analysis either, just that one doesn’t necessarily make any difference with the other.
    I hope ESPN is not overpaying for his current services.
    Keep plugging.

    • My only point is that he directly benefitted from playing ineffectively, and his analysis that I have read does in fact seem to reflect that background. For example, I seem to remember very recently that he and Bill Simmons were picking all-star teams or something, and he had both Carmelo Anthony and Kobe Bryant. Now don’t quote me, but is appears to me that he preaches what he practiced as well.

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